English 300 - Fall 2004

This is my class journal for Professor Sexson's Critical Theory class.



Why do some people not want to be educated?

Why? Because it's so much EASIER to be ignorant! Ignorance removes responsibility (in the eyes of the ignorant one), worries, contradictions, discrepancies, and thought in general. And if you don't have to THINK life is much easier.

It's also not really life.

I mean, come on. You can go through life not thinking, not experiencing anything, just going through like a zombie or a sheep or something. A Zombie-Sheep. But that is not living; that is existing.

Life comes from learning and experiencing. From struggling, being torn between two ideas, from suffering. It is not until we are confronted with conflict that we realize who we really are--what composes us.

People also don't want to learn because then they may change. Isn't consistency comfortable? When everything is constant? I think some people are afraid of what they might discover through education.

Like maybe what they think they believe isn't true at all.

Or that they don't even really believe what they thought they did.

Maybe that they are not who they thought they were.

Or that they don't know who they are. At all.

It's amazing what you can discover. And it's not always happy and uplifiting--something you can smile afterwards about and say "well that was nice. Now time for some beer."

But it is through such harrowing, straight-up truthful lessons that we get a better grip on reality--no, we get a better grip on OURSELVES. For there is no universal "reality" or "truth"--as much as we'd like to have one to cling to.

All we really have is ourselves.

And when you find this out--that you really are alone--you'd better know damn well who this "self" is that you're stuck with, because aside from this entity, there's nothing.


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